The Bachelor..."I thought I had the cat in the beg!"

My thoughts on this week's special "women tell all" episode of The Bachelor...

1. I forgot about half of these girls existed until they showed up on this episode. Wow!

2. "Where are they now" segment: I love how Chris Harrison reminds us that Trista and Ryan aren't the ONLY successful couple, but the producers obviously had to go waaaay back in the Rolodex to find another couple that was still together. 4 years back, to be precise. And they haven't even been together this whole time; they dated, broke up for a year, and then got back together. And why do you think it worked this time? Probably because they had more to base their relationship on than 7 weeks of on-camera dates while competing for each other's attention. But I did really like what Ryan said about his and Trista's relationship and why it works: they don't put any pressure on it to be a fairy tale; they just treat it like a relationship. Notice, that also has nothing to do with the Disney-subsidiary magic of meeting on an ABC reality show. Oh, also I am glad Trista is on Team Melissa too! Yay!

3. I have to admit I'm a little sad that Fred is taken. I was kind of hoping he was still floating around Chicago single somewhere...but his girl Noelle is adorable and they are obviously very perfect for each other. We got to see a whole lotta adorable Windy City b-roll of the two of them in cute hats and scarves and mittens and big puffy coats...so glad to see good ol' Fred is happy!

4. Well, Jesse has MOVED ON! Deanna who?!

5. I loved the huge welcome cheers Stephanie and Jillian got! Yeah girls!

6. Are the girls all sitting in martini glasses?!

7. I forgot about how much of a brat Natalie was! Way to go Chris for calling her OUT.

8. Poor Jillian. She thought she had the cat in the "beg" (aww, cute Canadian accent) and so did we. She totally made up for her ugly pink dress and boots with this green dress; very cute! And her final hot dog diagnosis on Jason: 70% mustard, 30% ketchup. Yup. And WOAH...is Jillian going to be the next Bachelorette?!! Does this play into the whole "dramatic final episode" thing?!! Is this just a question to throw us girls off the scent of how this is all gonna shake down??? Am I using waaay to much punctuation?!?!:;"...?

Yeah, probably.

Jillian was very cool with Jason, which I respect, but she also called him out on what the rest of us were thinking: if you're just not in love, you're just not in love. Don't make other excuses for it.

9. This episode definitely did NOT need to be 2 hours.

10. Kinda sad we didn't get to check in with Lisa, who left the show because her grandma was sick. But I'm probably the only one who remembers her anyway.

Next week is all the REAL action! Until then, you know where to find all my favorite recaps.

I'm going to bed.